I-Ching Excruciation: Is the US Air Force building secret spy planes which can cross the sky at 3,000mph?
Thursday, June 15, 2006 → by Danieru
When Fu Hsi, a mythical leader of ancient China, had the 8 trigrams of the I-Ching revealed to him supernaturally he was unlikely to have known the significance they would play on British Ministry of Defence denials some 5,000 years later. Perhaps even you, my intrepid reader, will find little relationship between the patterns perceived in the random spreading of 6 yarrow sticks and evidence of exotic aircraft now reputed to be emerging from revealed MoD documents. Allow me to blend past Chinese traditions with present Western denials in a maelstrom of reality bending intrigue... By using ancient superstitious methods I intend to focus your modern materialistic mind deep into the ether of reality divination:
Welcome to the era of bits of stick which can predict the future! Welcome, to the modernised mystical world of I-Ching Excruciation!
First we collect together our yarrow sticks, making sure their harmony beckons the principles of Yin & Yang into order. Next we must ask a question and shake the yarrows loose, allowing the patterns we read in the resulting hexagrams to act as the divination to our mediocre, deterministic lives. Here goes:
Question: Is the US Air Force building secret spy planes which can cross the sky at 3,000mph?
Due to the unfortunate fact that I do not have any ready-made yarrow sticks to hand, the glorious internet will have to suffice to divine us our answer. Luckily this free online I-Ching reading is available to us. What hexagrams will arise from this modern technological conspiratorial deliberation? Let's shake those conceptual, internet based, sticks of mystical foresight and see:
The 'burdened porter' is no doubt the Iraq-War-focused USA - his 'burden' (the super duper spy-plane thingy) will 'attract robbers' if he puts it on show...
And in the 'future' we (conspiracy fans everywhere) should stand 'firm and correct' in our handling of the truth, to alleviate the 'danger' and give way to 'penetration' (?). Sounds a clear cut case to me…
THE TIME HAS COME FOR PENETRATION OF THE TRUTH!
As I pop off to write this up and post it off to the British MoD please ponder for a moment the power of our yarrow-yin-yang companions. If a 5,000 year old divination method can shed light on the activities of secretive, supposedly democratic governments, what then for our post-paganistic, ritual-less society? Perhaps, be it a day or a thousand years from now, the sacred I-Ching will bring us our answers. But for now...
Answer: Yes!
Thank you I-Ching for being our ever vigilant looking glass of truth.
I hope you enjoyed I-Ching Excruciation as much as me and the MoD did... What question should I ask next?
Welcome to the era of bits of stick which can predict the future! Welcome, to the modernised mystical world of I-Ching Excruciation!
First we collect together our yarrow sticks, making sure their harmony beckons the principles of Yin & Yang into order. Next we must ask a question and shake the yarrows loose, allowing the patterns we read in the resulting hexagrams to act as the divination to our mediocre, deterministic lives. Here goes:
Due to the unfortunate fact that I do not have any ready-made yarrow sticks to hand, the glorious internet will have to suffice to divine us our answer. Luckily this free online I-Ching reading is available to us. What hexagrams will arise from this modern technological conspiratorial deliberation? Let's shake those conceptual, internet based, sticks of mystical foresight and see:
The present is embodied in Hexagram 40 - Hsieh (¦¦¦¦ - Deliverance): Advantage will be found in the southwest... If some operations are called for, there will be good fortune in the early conduct of them.HA! So it would seem there is a secret spy-plane thingy. We should act to conduct 'deliverance' of the truth early, somewhere in the 'South West' (presumably around Area 51, Nevada) to sustain our 'good fortune'!
The third line, divided, shows a porter with his burden, yet riding in a carriage. He will only tempt robbers to attack him. However firm and correct he may try to be, there will be cause for regret...
The future is embodied in Hexagram 32 - Heng (¦¦¦ - Duration): Successful progress and no error is indicated, but the advantage will come from being firm and correct...
The things least apparent, those below and behind, are embodied by the lower trigram K'an (¦¦ - Water), which is transforming into Sun (¦ - Wind). As part of this process, danger and the unknown are giving way to penetration and following.
- link to my I-Ching reading
The 'burdened porter' is no doubt the Iraq-War-focused USA - his 'burden' (the super duper spy-plane thingy) will 'attract robbers' if he puts it on show...
And in the 'future' we (conspiracy fans everywhere) should stand 'firm and correct' in our handling of the truth, to alleviate the 'danger' and give way to 'penetration' (?). Sounds a clear cut case to me…
THE TIME HAS COME FOR PENETRATION OF THE TRUTH!
As I pop off to write this up and post it off to the British MoD please ponder for a moment the power of our yarrow-yin-yang companions. If a 5,000 year old divination method can shed light on the activities of secretive, supposedly democratic governments, what then for our post-paganistic, ritual-less society? Perhaps, be it a day or a thousand years from now, the sacred I-Ching will bring us our answers. But for now...
Thank you I-Ching for being our ever vigilant looking glass of truth.
I hope you enjoyed I-Ching Excruciation as much as me and the MoD did... What question should I ask next?
Categories: Nonsense, Weird, Humour, Fun, News, Links, History, China, Technology, Conspiracy, Occult
Love said...
June 15, 2006 5:43 PM
Danieru said...
June 16, 2006 1:45 AM
Anonymous said...
April 17, 2008 3:25 AM
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